I like it here, I feel like i'm home.
But which home is this supposed to be?
Im starting to sit outside again, waiting to come inside.
I didn't think that would happen again. I'm not supposed to wait outside, of my own home.
Is this the home that makes me feel free and inspired or is this the feeling of my old home where my feelings were convoluted and squashed down until nothing. Until I started waiting outside in my car until i could muster up the courage to walk through the door without faking a smile.
No one wants to do that. Feel like they have to put a new mask on when they walk through their own door. A person should be able to strip off all of their layers of camouflage when they take their first step through the entrance at the end of their long day.
Its not supposed to be like this.
Not this way. Not for me.